That’s a reasonable question, and not the first time I’ve gotten it. I can say with a fair degree of certainty that this won’t be the last, either. However I’m more than happy to reply as I feel I have a rather well-rounded answer.

When it comes to fetishes and kinks people often make the mistake of looking at them at face value. They focus too heavily on the physical act(s) that is taking place. At their core, almost every fetish is much more of an emotional and mental experience than it is a physical one. Sure the physical act, the toys and implements we use are attractive to us, but they wouldn’t be nearly as interesting if we didn’t put some kind of meaning behind them.

For people who are into spanking, the pain can be enjoyable, but many spanking fetishists also really enjoy the humiliating connotations of such a “childish” punishment. For foot fetishists looking at another person’s feet may be arousing, but partially because of the strange taboos and aversions we have around feet.

Going back to the original question… I think what really turns on most diaper fetishists, whether they are into regression, humiliation, bondage or some combination of these, is a loss of control. Controlling our bowel and urinary habits is one of the first things we are taught. Having such a base control stripped away has some intense psychological implications. In the case of adult babies, for example, having to use a diaper helps to regress them mentally. As their control is taken away from them it becomes almost comforting -enabling them to mentally return to a time when their lives were less stressful.

For diaper lovers, or people who aren’t as much into the regressive element, that loss of control is still important. Many of them enjoy handing over control to a dominant partner, and having to use a diaper and/or having one’s bodily functions is one way a Top can assert power over a bottom, while effectively putting them in the proper submissive head space.

Personally I enjoy wetting my diaper. I do not particularly enjoy messing them, but I don’t mind doing it for a shoot. I can however appreciate the regressive element of it, but that’s probably because I am more into the ageplay and/or Adult Baby side of the fetish. I enjoy wearing diapers because I like getting to be little and taken care of. They help me feel more secure in times of intense stress.

I’m not going to sit here and say that having a fetish for diapers, and using them, isn’t weird but all fetishes and kinks are weird to some degree. That’s part of what makes them interesting and enjoyable to many people. We have a saying in the kink community: “your kink is not my kink, and that’s okay.” Kinksters know that there are all types of fetishes out there, and new ones are being explored everyday. Some of them may seem a little bizarre, but we try to respect what other people are into even if we don’t understand it.

Some people may argue: “But isn’t there a limit? Some things are just too weird…” Perhaps so. But as long as the fetish is always between risk-aware, consenting adults over the age of 18, who are we to say what that limit is?

Epicly good response and really great explanation of the underlying rationale many come into abdl with.

By far one of the best explanations of our fetish to the outside world, I’ve read in a long time…

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